Concrete angel:
Jared was seventeen the first time somebody cared.
Jensen
I stroll through the doors, peering at the graffiti on the walls with a frown. I hate places like this, where kids are given the best and then just fuck it all up because they can.
I don’t understand it. My momma always taught me to be grateful, even for small things because somewhere, there’s someone who would die to be in my position. I always remember that when I’m complaining about petty things.
A bunch of laughing boys shove past me and I grin at the yelled apology.
“Mr. Ackles?” a tired voice calls out, making me glance down the corridor towards a short, chubby man in a grey suit.
“Mr. Terrichine, I presume?” I reply, reaching out to shake the man’s hand.
“Yeah, but everyone calls me Terry. Follow me please.”
“They told me you needed a gym coach?” I get straight down to the point.
Terry lets me into an office, scattered with papers and so untidy it makes me cringe. Terry doesn’t notice. “Yes, that is one of the reasons. But I heard you’re also a qualified counsellor?”
“Yes, that is correct.”
“Would it be possible for you to serve as both? Our usual counsellor, Ms. Fish, has just discovered that she’s pregnant.”
I nod, “Yeah, that’s fine, I’d need an office for that, though.”
“Of course. Fantastic, now, let me just introduce you to the school, our assembly begins in a few moments.”
♥
I shift on the sticky chair, gazing down at the sea of bright colours. The children are yelling and screaming, completely ignoring Terry as he calls for silence.
Beside me, the rest of teachers sit, all looking bored out of their skins, giving me the feeling that this is just a common part of their lives.
“… someone new to introduce,” Terry bellows into the mic, finally causing the room to fall silent. “Mr. Ackles is the new gym coach and counsellor. I expect you all to make him feel welcome.”
Terry gestures at me to come over, and I nearly let out a groan when he hands me the microphone.
“Good morning, everyone. It’s awesome to be here.”
When I make my way back to my seat, a bunch of girls in the front row whistle at me, giggling and showing off their obscenely tight shirts.
I feel like bashing my head against a wall.
As the assembly proceeds, I let my eyes roam over the masses, trying to steel myself for the rest of the year, beginning to dread it already.
♥
By the end of the second gym class of the day, I’m already exhausted. The only ones who listen to me are the girls and then it’s only because they’re trying to get my attention. The boys are all off in their own world.
The bell rings and a new lot file into the sports hall. They’re all exactly like the other classes, or at least, they are until the last figure steps through the hall. He’s the only one not wearing sweats.
After greeting them all, I head over towards him, “Hey, why aren’t you in sports clothes?”
His wide eyes peer up at me and his lips open slowly. He’s trembling.
“Are you okay?” I ask softly, eying his torn clothes and the shadows beneath his eyes.
Laughter comes from behind me, “Don’t mind him, that’s just Jared. He never does gym in anything but rags.”
Ignoring the boys, I tug the kid up, “Come on, I think I have a few spare sets in my office.
He drops his eyes and lets me lead him around the corner, but his trembling only increases when I lay a hand on his shoulder. “Are you sick?”
Hiding behind his bangs, he doesn’t say a word.
When we’re in my office, I toss him a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, but he just stares blankly at them.
“Come on, you’d better change.”
Wide eyes peer up at mine and he pleads softly, “Sir… I… please… I can’t… I can’t…”
“What do you mean?”
He just falls silent again.
Using a more commanding tone, I repeat, “Get changed, we’re going to be late.”
I turn around to give him more privacy, but when I hear his soft hiss in what sounds like pain, I spin around again. He flinches and shifts backwards, hiding his chest with his sweater.
“Are you hurt?”
He shakes his head, but dark bruising is visible on his shoulder, “What happened there?”
Squeezing his eyes closed, he shakes his head again.
I tug the sweater from his arms and gasp at the purpling bruises splashed over his abdomen. “What happened here?”
“I… I fell… sir…. Down… down the stairs at home… I was clumsy….”
“You…” I don’t know what to think, but when his shivering only increases, I feel something clench in my chest and I hand him the sports shirt, “Here, you’d best put that on.”
“Thank… thank you, sir…”
I had planned on dodge ball today, but I find myself changing the plans to something a bit milder.
“Alright, two of you, come stand here.”
Two of the jocks saunter over.
“Pick your teams, one person at a time.”
As they continue, I realise what a horrible mistake I’ve made. I clench my teeth together when Jared’s the last one standing there, shivering in my too-large shirt with his gaze lowered to the floor.
The boy who’s just picked laughs at the other, “He’s all yours.”
“That’s not freaking fair, why do I have to have the weirdo on my team?”
I swallow thickly as Jared’s shoulders hunch up, like he’s shielding himself from their words.
“Boys, stop being so childish,” I snap at them, before blowing the whistle, “Okay, everybody, line up.”
♥
“Terry?” I knock softly.
“Come in,” he grunts from inside. “Ahh, Mr. Ackles, how’s your first day been?”
I smile weakly, “It’s been okay, what I expected, I guess.”
“Is everything alright?”
“Yes, well… I mean, I was just wondering what the deal is with that Jared kid.”
“Padalecki?”
I nod.
“Oh, well…” Terry sighs softly, “He’s a bit of a problem child… mom died when he was a kid, lives with his dad. He’s always been quiet, never really fitted in…never tried, actually. No one really knows what to do about him. His dad does his best though, poor man.”
A few moments later, I leave the office, feeling even more confused than ever. As I pass the food hall, I give the cursory glance inside, before stopping and backtracking. Jared is standing before one of the bigger jocks who seems to be threatening him. I watch angrily as Jared hands his tray over and the boy takes it to the trashcan, emptying it out before shoving it back at Jared.
He doesn’t even say anything, just silently returns the tray to the pile and heads towards the exit, where I’m standing.
“Hey, Jared,” I reach out to clamp my hand on his shoulder, remembering a second too late why I shouldn’t do that. He gasps softly but doesn’t try to move away or anything. I remove my hand quickly, but when he nervously glances up, his eyes are glistening. My voice is slightly hoarse as I ask him quietly, “Can I talk to you?”
His face pales, but he just nods, “Yes, sir…”
Once we’re in my office and I have the door firmly shut, I turn back to find him standing in the middle of the room, looking terrified. “It’s okay; you’re not in trouble or anything like that. Why don’t you sit down?”
When he complies, I pull my chair in front of him. “Do you want a sandwich?” I ask casually, fishing my lunch out the drawer. “I’m not really hungry.”
Humiliation shines in his eyes for the split second they meet mine, then his gaze drops to the floor, “No, thank you, sir. I’m fine….”
“Come on,” I nudge softly, “You’re a growing boy. ‘sides, it’ll just go to waste otherwise.”
“I…”
“Why don’t you keep it for later? You’ll be doing me a favour. At the last place I worked, I left a sandwich in my drawer because I wasn’t hungry… three weeks later I found it… completely green…”
His lips quirk into a small smile, giving me a flash of dimples, and he slowly reaches out for the outstretched packet. “Thank you,” he murmurs quietly, tucking it away in his backpack.
A few moments pass in silence, with him shifting around uncomfortably as I study him.
“Is everything okay, Jared?” I finally ask.
“Ye…Yes, sir…Why… why would you ask something… something like that?”
“It’s just a question… Can I look at your bruises again? I have cream that’ll help. Stop them from being so sore when you move.”
He looks up at me in confusion, “Mr. Ackles?”
Reaching behind me, I pull out some Arnica cream. “Take off your sweater.”
The boy shudders, his eyes shadowed, but he does as he’s told without uttering a word. I nod him towards my desk; “It’d probably be best if you sat up there.”
I stand before him, unscrewing the tube of cream and nudging my way between his knees so I can reach his bruised chest. “Must have been a nasty fall,” I mutter softly, eying the furious patches.
“Wh-what?” he asks nervously.
“Your fall? Down the stairs?”
“Oh,” he seems to shake himself, “Yeah… yeah, it was.”
At the first contact of my fingers against his chest, he jumps and his stomach flutters beneath my touch, his eyes wide and terrified.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” I murmur calmly, rubbing the cream in with soothing strokes. “I did some training as a physical therapist.”
Gradually, he seems to relax, breathing easier and no longer shying away from me like a terrified kitten.
The bruise runs right down past his waistband, but I don’t even think about going there. When I’ve rubbed it all in, I don’t immediately remove my hands, instead holding my palms flat against his skin, “There, you feeling a bit better?”
He nods, clearing his throat, “Yes… thank you… sir, I…” he ducks his head, “Thank you…”
Then he tenderly hops off the desk, stumbling slightly. I reach out to catch him and his breath hitches; for a moment he just stands there, his eyes wide and frightened, then he turns and is out of my office before I can blink, his sweater clutched to his chest and his backpack swinging from his bare shoulder.
♥
♥
I occasionally see him around the following week, but it’s only brief glimpses before he disappears in the swarm of kids.
When I find myself sitting in my office, listening to annoying, preppy cheerleaders bitching on and on about the latest ‘slut’ in their team and how she’s ‘conspiring to steal her boyfriend’, I often find my mind wandering, and as I pass the food hall each day, I always glance inside, searching for him.
Monday finally approaches, and I’m ashamed to admit it, but I’m really eager to see him again. Maybe it’s because I’m worried about him, I don’t really know.
He shows up in another ratty sweater, with his head lowered and hands tucked in the pockets of his frayed jeans.
After greeting the class and instructing them to begin shooting hoops, I head towards him. “Hey, Jared. No sweats again today?”
His cheeks flush pink and he fidgets nervously, “I… Mr. Ackles...sir… I don’t… I don’t have…”
Frowning at the realisation, I nod, “Oh, I see…. Well, listen, I’ll write a letter to your dad about it, maybe we can come up with a solution if it’s money-related.”
His eyes snap up to mine, shimmering with something I can’t quite decipher, but they drop down to the ground again, “Yes, sir…”
I lead him towards my office, letting him in. “How’re the bruises, by the way?”
“Oh…” he bites his lip, “They… uhm…”
“Can I take a look?”
Wide eyes meet mine and he flinches as I step forwards slowly, reaching out to grip the hem of his sweater.
I can’t help gaping at the sight of his chest and sides, and he pulls away quickly, moving around the desk so it’s between us.
“Jared, what happened there?” I ask softly, not wanting to scare him even more.
Swallowing, he looks anywhere but me, his eyes darting towards the door as if for an escape route.
“Jared, is someone hurting you?” I move towards him slowly.
He lets out a soft, choked off sob and turns away, his shoulders trembling. “Jared,” I murmur softly, “it’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you. Just tell me who did that to you.”
“No…no one,” he gets out, “I… I… my foot got caught in the railing by the field, I fell onto the poles, the splinters did this,” he babbles quickly.
It doesn’t ring true.
“Come with me to the nurse, Jared. We need to get you looked at.”
Flinching as if struck, he turns around quickly, “No… please… I’m… I’m okay, sir… really… I just… I just…” he drops his gaze and whispers, “I’m just clumsy.”
“Clumsy, my ass,” I growl, making him jump. Instantly regretting the anger in my voice, I reach out, wincing when he shies away from my hand, but not stopping as I run a hand gently over his shoulder, “Jared… whatever… whatever’s happening… if you need to talk about… anything, just know that I’m here, okay?
He just blinks blankly up at me and I let out a soft sigh, “Just sit down over here, I’ll be back in a few moments.”
After quickly giving the class some instructions and leaving a few responsible ones in charge, I head back, quickly paging Sandy, the school nurse, on my way.
He hasn’t moved from where he’s awkwardly perched on the edge of the seat, but he jumps as I step into the room.
“The nurse is coming now,” I murmur softly, reaching out but dropping my hand at the last minute.
“Okay,” he chokes out. “But… I was just…”
“Clumsy, yeah, I know,” I soothe quietly.
The nurse is a gentle woman with an easy smile: she swirls into my office and eyes Jared, “So, you’re a new kid?”
Jared blinks slowly, before getting out hoarsely, “No, ma’am… I… I’ve been here about three years…”
“Oh,” she frowns, “I’ve never seen you before… Well, then. Let’s see what we have.”
I move forward, “Last week he had bruising on his stomach and shoulder, I gave him some Arnica cream,” she nods, “but today maybe you’d better take a look
Sandy moves forward with her no nonsense attitude and ignores Jared’s protesting as she lifts up his sweater, “My…” she breathes. “What happened here, honey?”
Closing his eyes as her fingers roam his chest, he mumbles, “Tripped. Fell on a fence post…”
The nurse glances back at me and we exchange worried looks. “And what was it that happened last week?”
“Uhm…” Jared bites his lip, “Oh… I… I fell down stairs…”
“Ahh,” Sandy murmurs, “You’d best sit down.”
I quickly move forward to clear my desk, “It’s not the most comfortable place but…”
“It’ll do,” she finishes, quickly pulling out a pair of scissors and cutting through the sweater.
Jared gasps, “What… what are you doing?”
“Well, honey, you’re in no condition to move your arms with this,” Sandy gestures at his bared chest, covered in bruises and cuts. “And besides… that hideous thing is well beyond its expiration date.”
I agree with her, but the horrified expression on Jared’s face has a twinge of guilt racing through me despite it not being my fault.
She just tsks and pulls things from her bag, gauze and antiseptic and various other odds and ends. “Now let me see the rest of you,” she spins him around, and we both inhale sharply as we see his back. “Holy…”
Jared is trembling more than ever now, his face completely ashen, eyes squeezed shut as if we’re hurting him.
“Jared, please. Who did this?”
His face crumbles up and he shakes his head, tears splashing everywhere as he breathes, “I’m clumsy… just clumsy… I’m clumsy.”
I can’t take it any longer: stepping up before him, I slide my arms around his quivering form, making him gasp and try to pull away. Keeping my grip loose so I don’t aggravate his injuries, I gently press him against me.
His thin form shakes beneath my touch, and his terrified voice asks waveringly, “What… what are you doing?”
“Hugging you,” I reply simply, pressing his head to my shoulder.
I glance up at Sandy, only to see her smiling softly. She nods her head encouragingly.
“Jared, it’s okay…” I whisper.
It seems like hours later that he finally relaxes, sagging into me and sliding his arms around my waist.
Smiling in relief, I slip my fingers through his hair, “Alright, come on, we’d better let Sandy do her stuff.”
He keeps his head lowered as he pulls away, not looking up as Sandy carefully cleans and patches each and every one of his cuts. When she’s finished wrapping the gauze around his torso, she smiles at us both, “Ok, I’ll see you around, boys. Call me if you need anything else.”
The sight of him shivering in the centre of my office has something weird shooting through me, and I glance down at his shredded sweater before pulling my own off, “Here, you can take this.”
He stands there staring at the brown sweater in my hand, and he doesn’t move. Stepping forwards, I nod my head, “Let me help you.”
I wince in sympathy as he raises his arms, but I can’t help smiling at him once it’s on. The sweater just seems to swallow him up.
His eyes warm slightly and, though he only offers a small smile in return, it makes me feel like I’ve won the biggest prize there is.
“Come on, we’d better get back to the class. See what the damage is.”
He obediently follows behind me.
♥
“Terry?” I call into the room.
“Yeah? Come in.”
“Hey, sir.” I take a seat in front of him again.
“Mr. Ackles, what can I do for you this time?”
“Sir, it’s about Jared Padalecki again.”
“Oh, what’s he done?”
“Nothing, I just… I have reason to believe he’s being abused.”
Terry’s eyes widen, “Oh, and what would make you think that?”
“His back, it looked like it had been whipped, and his chest was bruised last week, but is even worse this week.”
“That’s a very serious allegation, Mr. Ackles.”
“I know. But I’m ninety-nine percent certain that I’m correct. Even the nurse, Sandy, agrees with me.”
“And who exactly do you think is abusing him?”
“Well, maybe his father?”
Terry looks outraged, “Mr. Ackles, I’ll have you know, Gerry Padalecki is an outstanding gentleman, and he’s one of my best friends as well. We go way back. I think I would have noticed if he was abusing his own son.”
I frown slightly, realising that’s a very good reason for him to be biased, but I don’t say a word.
“Now, maybe there is someone else, but until you find solid proof and a better suspect, you’ve got nothing.”
“Yes, sir.” I get to my feet and leave, trying to control the anger surging through me.
As I pass the receptionist’s office, I hesitate and decide to follow my instinct. The small woman looks up at me, “Can I help you, Mr Ackles?”
“Well, I’m hoping so. Do you know anything about Gerald Padalecki?”
Surprise spreads over her features, but she nods, “Padalecki? That sounds familiar. Hold on a second.” She turns to her computer, quickly typing something. “Yeah, says here he’s one of the school’s regular donors; been giving money for the past three years.”
Something bitter fills my throat, but I force a smile at her, “Thank you, you’ve been a great help.”
♥
Jared doesn’t show up at school the next day. I even check the register: he’s marked as absent, apparently his dad called him in sick.
♥
By the end of the week, I’m worried sick. Searching through the phone lists in the office, I eventually manage to pull his cell phone number up.
After entering it into my phone, I fold myself in my chair and wait.
“Hello?” a man with a gruff voice answers, and I realise this isn’t Jared’s phone.
“Hi, is this Mr. Padalecki?”
“Yes, who’s speaking?”
“This is Mr. Ackles; I’m a staff member at Jared’s school. I was just wondering why he hasn’t been at school lately.”
There’s the sound of movement, and then the man replies, “There was an accident. Idiot boy was climbing the tree out front. He fell and hurt his arm.”
My throat closes up, “Oh, do you know when he’ll be back?”
“No, now excuse me, I’m about to go into a meeting, goodbye.”
The man hangs up and I nearly throw my phone against the wall. Jared’s arm has been injured.
Now I’m even more certain that it’s his father doing it.
Maybe I’m overreacting, but I find myself rifling through the files again, searching for his address.
♥
The house I pull up to is single story. The yard in front is bare and dry, with only a single bush beside the front door and without a tree in sight. Gritting my teeth together, I slip out of the car and head up the path.
I hear movement inside: the curtain to the left of me draws back slightly before dropping again. A few moments later, the door pulls open, and a ghostly pale Jared steps out, his arm in a make-shift sling and bruises darkening the skin around his eye.
“Sir, please, you have to go… please…”
“Jared,” I reach out for him, wincing as he stumbles away and hits his back against the door. “Tell me the truth. What happened?”
“I… I was running and I didn’t see… I…”
“Don’t lie to me, Jared,” I interrupt softly.
“I… I…” he drops his gaze to the floor and whispers, “It was an accident.”
“Oh, yeah, sure, I’ll bet he just slipped and his fist happened to smash into your face?”
He flinches and shakes his head, “N… no… please… You should go…”
“No, tell me who’s hurting you, it’s your dad, isn’t it?” I step closer to him, gently landing a hand on his shoulder. “Jared, you can trust me. I want to help you.”
Glancing up hesitantly, Jared opens his mouth, about to say something. “I… it’s… it’s…”
There’s a rumbling sound from the street behind me, and Jared jumps, terror spreading over his face, “Please, you mustn’t be here.” He shoves me behind a nearby bush, begging me, “Stay… please… just… just stay…promise me you won’t interfere…”
I nod slowly.
Then he darts inside, pulling the door closed behind him. Moments later, a man strides into view, his face cruel and his lips thin. His footfalls are heavy on the gravel and after unlocking the door, he shoves it open and bellows, “Boy?”
“Here, Dad,” Jared’s soft voice replies.
“I got a call from your fucking teacher! What lies have you been spreading? Huh? Spreading lies to make them all feel sorry for you, bet you have them lapping from your palm, don’t you? You fucking little brat! Was it the same one you stole the sweater from? Was it? I shouldn’t have been so gentle on you, you lying little thief.”
My stomach drops as I realise why Jared’s arm was probably broken.
“No, Dad… Please… I don’t… I never… I’m sorry, Dad… I’m sorry….”
“Go to your room, fucking waste of space!”
I am so close to leaping up and punching the man’s face in, but Jared made me promise to stay here, and I’m afraid that Jared will be the one this bastard takes it out on if I do anything. I don’t want Jared to get hurt because of me again.
The only way I’m going to beat that man up is if I know Jared is well out of the reach of his fist.
Slowly, I creep back to my car, thankful that I parked it on the opposite side so the man didn’t realise I was here.
When I get home, I call my brother, grateful for the first time that Josh works with the police force and knows how to deal with this stuff.
“Hello?”
I sag onto my couch with the wave of relief that hits me, “Hey, Josh, it’s me.”
“Jensen? How’re you doing, man? How’s the new job?”
“Good, well… no, not that good actually…”
“Why? What happened?”
“Josh… there’s… there’s this kid… and he’s… fuck… he’s…” I trail off, unsure of how to word the sentence.
“Don't tell me you've fallen in love with a pupil,” he begs, laughter in his voice.
I choke on air, and splutter, “Wha… what? No! No, Josh, it’s not like that…” My brain snapshots to an image of Jared’s soft lips parting, but I shake myself out of it, “No, it’s nothing like that,” I repeat firmly.
“Thank God. I really wouldn’t want to have to bring you in for that.”
Laughing nervously, I adjust my collar, “No, of course not…”
“What is it then?”
Remembering why I’m contacting him, I let out a soft sigh, “This kid… he’s… he’s being abused… by his dad…. Whipped… beaten… yelled at… the bastard broke his arm just because he went home with wearing the sweater I lent him.”
Josh is silent for a few minutes, but when he speaks, his voice is furious, “How do you know this?”
“A few weeks ago, gym class… the boy was there… he didn’t have sweats so I took him to my office and lent him some spares, he sounded like he was in pain, so I turned to check on him, saw the bruises… Said he fell down the stairs…” I laugh hoarsely, “He doesn’t even have fucking stairs… Then a week later, he had worse… welts on his back, God… cuts and bruises everywhere… I had the nurse look at him, but he wouldn’t say who did it… Then… he was missing for a week… this morning I called a cell phone, it was his dad … said Jared had hurt his arm falling out a tree in their front yard… I went to his house… they don’t even have a fucking tree there… and Jared was there… bruises on his face… he’s so scared, Josh… and I… I didn’t know what to do to make it better…”
“Fuck, Jen,” Josh breathes, and I realise my eyes are blurry with moisture.
Clearing my throat, I murmur, “What should I do?”
“Have you spoken to the principal about this?”
I scowl down at the coffee table, “Yeah, he’s apparently best buddies with Jared’s dad, so no way in hell is he going to back us. There’s even some crap about Jared’s dad donating money to the school or something like that.”
“Fuck…” Josh mutters, “Okay, this kid, Jared? Tell me about him.”
“He’s….” I close my eyes, bringing up the first time I saw Jared, “He’s so scared… I don’t know how he… everyday… he comes to school, the kids tease him and bully him… he doesn’t do or say anything to them… he just… he acts like it doesn’t matter to him, but it does… it really does… God, Josh… the pain in his eyes… it’s like… it makes me… Josh, you know how rarely I cry, right?”
The man snorts, but replies, “Yeah, yeah, macho man.”
“Well… the past few weeks… damn, I’ve felt like crying… seeing him so hurt and scared… he’s like a kitten, an abused kitten… I just want to bundle him up in a warm blanket and hide him away from everyone… I just…” I choke on my words and can’t carry on any longer.
Josh’s voice is soft, soothing, “You want me there?”
“Please?” I murmur softly, not even feeling embarrassed about wanting my big brother here.
“’kay, I’ll be there in a couple of days, tops. Don’t do anything stupid.”
♥
♥
Jared’s back at school the following Wednesday, still wearing his improvised sling. I spot him as he enters the school. His face has lingering bruises, but it looks like he’s got cover-up on. As he makes his way painfully through the crowd of people, no one even looks up. It’s like he’s a ghost who doesn’t exist.
A wave of anger passes through me and I realise that this abuse has probably been going on for ages; it’s just that no one bothered to notice.
“Hey, Jared,” I call from my car, smiling as he hesitantly heads towards me, “Hop in, I’m just going for a quick coffee, I’ll have you back in time for class, I promise.”
His eyes widen in terror and he begins babbling, “Sir, please… I’m sorry about your sweater…. I… it tore when I…when I had the accident… I… please don’t be mad… I’ll… I can… work to pay you back… I’ll… I can clean... I’ll do anything…”
Quickly stopping him, I try not to punch the steering wheel, my only consolidation is the thought that Jared’s dad will soon be behind bars. “Jared, it’s okay. I don’t care about the sweater, really. Don’t worry about it. But come on, let’s grab some coffee.”
He frowns slightly, but winces as the bruise is pressed. “Sir?” he asks softly, his voice small and unsure.
“It’s okay, just coffee, maybe even a muffin.” I shoot him my most winning grin and I see something crumble in his eyes.
“Okay… if you… if you want, sir…”
Luckily, being school counsellor, I have permission to take kids off the premise, so it’s not like I’m breaking any rules.
The fact that he winces as he sits down does not escape my notice, but I don’t say anything as I pull out of the staff parking lot.
The whole way, he doesn’t move or shift or say or do anything. When I break the silence, he jumps as if I yelled, “How’re you feeling?” I ask softly.
Clearing his throat, he glances nervously at me, then back down at his lap, “Fi…fine, sir… Just… fine…”
“Don’t lie to me, Jared. Please, don’t lie to me.” I turn towards him, “Look, I saw… okay? I heard and I saw and I’m not fucking stupid.”
He flinches and cringes at my words, utter humiliation spreading across his face, “Sorry,” he whispers hoarsely.
“It’s not your fault, Jared… You need to talk to me… I can’t help you if I don’t know what he’s doing to you…. Why are you sore when you sit down? Why is your fucking arm broken? Why is your face bruised like that?”
“I…” he looks out the window, his eyes glistening, “I… I can’t… sir… please, don’t make me…. I can’t…. And… it’s not broken, sir…. Just… just sore.”
“What’s the excuse going to be today, huh? Slipped and bashed your face into the bathroom sink?”
A tear slips down his cheek and it’s like a punch to my gut. “Sir… I… I deserve… deserve it all…. Please… please don’t tell…. I can’t… he… he’ll be mad…”
“Why do you think you deserve it? Jared, what would make you think something like that?”
His face crumbles and more tears slip down his face, “I… I deserve it all… Please… just…”
“Okay,” I breathe softly, reaching out to wipe the dampness from his face, “Alright, what do you feel like? Should I just run in and get us some muffins?”
When his blank look is all that meets mine, I nod, “I’ll be right back…”
♥
Josh arrives the following day and I nearly start crying when he hugs me.
“You okay, man?” he asks softly, squeezing my arms.
“Yeah… it’s just… everything’s… I just… it feels like I’m the only one who cares….”
“You probably are.” Josh replies sadly, “When can I see this kid?”
♥
On Friday, I get written permission from Sandy to take Jared home under the pretence that he’s sick. Well, he’s hurt more than enough to pull that off. But instead of taking him to his house, I’m going to take him to mine.
He looks up at me with wide eyes as I lead him towards the car, “Where… where we going, sir?”
“I want you to meet someone… he’ll help you… help us both…”
“What… what do you mean?” He asks softly, sounding terrified.
“Don’t worry, you’ll see.”
After we’ve been driving in silence for a few minutes with me getting increasingly worked up at the thought of Jared’s father, he asks softly, “Are you… are you mad at me?”
I blink at him, “No. God, no, Jared. I’m not mad at you.”
“Oh…” he smiles faintly, “Good… I don’t…I don’t want you to be mad at me…”
I pull up on my driveway and he steps out slowly, grimacing in pain before turning his eyes on the house. “Who lives here?”
“I do…”
“Oh,” he murmurs softly, glancing around at the blooming greenery and the flowers, “It’s nice.”
“Thank you,” I step up behind him, gesturing for him to make his way towards the front door, but before he’s taken two paces forward, the door opens and Josh steps out.
Immediately Jared tenses and shies backwards, his back coming in contact with my chest. I feel like grinning goofily when he doesn’t pull away.
“Jared, this is my brother, Josh. He’s a police sergeant.”
Quickly turning around, Jared’s terrified eyes meet mine and he begins pleading with me softly, “Sir… I’m sorry…. I’m sorry… I don’t know what I did… the sweater… Oh, God… I’m so sorry… please… don’t send me away… I’ll… they’ll tell him… please, don’t.”
“Shhh,” I brush my hands down his shoulders before sliding my arms around his waist, pulling him in for a gentle hug, being careful of his sling, “It’s okay, Jared. He’s not here to take you away, and he’s not going to tell your dad. He just wants to help you…”
“Why?” Jared chokes, burying his face in my shoulder.
“Because I asked him to, because I want him to.”
“Will it make you not mad at me if I talk to him?” he asks quietly.
“Jared, I’m already not mad at you, but it would make me very happy.”
At that he pulls away from me, turning back to Josh who has watched the whole scene with a raised eyebrow.
♥
About two hours later, they come out into the living room. Jared’s face is streaked with tears and he’s still crying. I instantly jump to my feet, holding my arms out for him. He shuffles up to me slowly, tentatively sliding into my embrace and letting me take some of his weight.
Over his shoulder, I search Josh for signs of how it went, but Josh looks just as shaken, his face ashen and his eyes watery.
“It’s okay, Jared. It’s okay…”
Josh puts away a small notebook and gestures outside. Understanding what he means, I quickly nudge Jared towards the couch. “Why don’t you watch some TV for now? I’m just going to talk to Josh for a bit.”
Jared just nods, not looking up as I follow my brother out the room.
“Well?” I turn to Josh, who only shakes his head.
“The things… the things those bastards did to him… God, I just feel like tossing all my police ethics and storming in there with a smoking gun.”
“I’d be right behind you,” I murmur as I flop down on the couch. “Wait… there’s more than one?”
Josh makes a face, “It’s the father and the stepbrother.”
“Goddammit!” I growl.
“Yeah, and while I’ve got enough here for him to have a pretty good case against the fuckers, the problem is, with the school not cooperating, and there being very little actual proof of the abuse, they could easily get away with it.”
“So what are we going to do?”
“Take him to hospital to see if there’s any physical evidence remaining, take photographs of Jared’s injuries, get the nurse – what did you say her name was? – to testify…”
“He’s not going back there, Josh,” I state firmly.
He nudges my shoulder, “Jensen… this is going to take time…. We… the last thing we want is to be accused of abducting the kid. I’m calling CPS now; we’ll get them involved.”
“But-”
“Jensen, I know. But we need to follow procedure.”
Dropping my head, I nod with a sigh, “Yeah… it’s just… I don’t know, Josh. I really care about this kid…”
Josh nods, his eyes warm, “He is a pretty awesome kid, I’ll admit…”
You found me
When no one else was lookin'
How did you know just where I would be?
Yeah, you broke through
All of my confusion
The ups and the downs
And you still didn't leave
I guess that you saw what nobody could see
You found me
You found me
You’re by my side
Now everything’s fine
And I was hiding
'Til you came along
And showed me where I belong
You found me
When no one else was lookin'
How did you know?
How did you know?
♥
